Author Archives: ramblingsofaperforatedmind

Juggling Chainsaws

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I feel like I’m juggling chain saws lately. Let me explain. I have a full-time job as a Spanish teacher with a history class thrown in for fun (and it has been a blast so far!). On the weekends, I do laundry at the local nursing home. If you’re counting, that’s two chain saws in the air. I am also studying for my Master’s (in Spanish, of course) and taking six credits (two classes) each semester. I’m counting each class as a chain saw, so that’s four, right? Did I mention I have two lovely daughters? Only one is still at home, so she counts as my fifth. I also have a house full of furry kids, so let’s figure them all as one more. (They are darlings, and they are considered family.) Since I’m a volunteer firefighter, I am glad things have not been very flammable lately. I do, however, have meetings to attend.

Right now I feel that all the chain saws are in the air—but it is a precarious situation. I have the sinking suspicion that one is about to drop to the ground. Let’s just hope it doesn’t whack off something important when it does.

Missing Mexico

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My neighbor in Mexico

My neighbor in Mexico

On cold days like today, I miss Mexico more and more. It’s not just the temperature, you understand; it’s the warmth of hanging out with friends and family that I miss so much—having some bonding time at Oxxo or Italian Coffee, laughing at nothing just because we can, people-watching and enjoying the bartering in the market.

I have friends in Nebraska, but I’ve only been here four years. I still classify people as “work” friends or “people I know.” For me, it takes much longer than four years to form a strong, real friendship. My friends—the ones I really count on—can be numbered on one hand. They have been through hard times with me, and we have come out stronger for it. People who know me in Virginia or Mexico have a much deeper understanding of who I am than people I’ve met here in my adopted town. I’m not saying anything negative about people here; it simply IS. It takes a long time for me to really trust someone. A gal I know said I have trust issues. Not true. I’m just not stupid or easy to know.

I can call my friends, wherever they may be, and we can start our conversation where we left off before no matter how long it’s been since we chatted. My best friend knows how I drink my coffee, what I think about politics, and how I raise my kids. She also knows how to guard a secret and watch my back. The same things make us laugh. Or cry. She knows my deepest regrets, and she still respects me in spite of my failings. THAT is true friendship.

Friendship takes time! Ysabela and her friend, Gidalty

Friendship takes time!
Ysabela and her friend, Gidalty

Energy Vampires

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Are you feeling tired and rundown? Are you in good physical health? Do you “have it together” in your head? Job going well? If you are on a roll in your life, but there’s still “something” wearing you down, you may be the victim of an energy-sucking vampire.

A what? You read it correctly. An energy-sucking vampire. If you have ever been in contact with one of this not-so-rare breed, you know exactly what I mean. Maybe your friend comes to visit, stays a while, leaves, and you feel worn out by the time the visit is over. You close the door after him or her, lock it and sigh. You might even have a headache. You survived, but the price is high. This particular breed of human takes your energy like a vampire takes blood. You have my sympathy if you are a victim. You also will have some advice.

There’s a lock on the door for a reason. Use it, and don’t apologize. You have the right to be comfortable and free from intrusions in your own home. Your home is, after all, your castle. Pull up the drawbridge! (I am considering building a moat!)

Set limits on those who waste your time. It can be awkward, but sometimes you just have to say something. Don’t let anyone run over you, especially when it concerns how you spend your precious free time. Friendship should be a pleasure, not an expectation or a duty. It takes time to develop a real, solid friendship. If you’d rather not visit, just say so. Remember: the energy vampire keeps you from doing things you want to do. Be assertive.

Let me insert here that I am not known for my tact, but when it comes to protecting my free time after a hard day’s work, I can be ferocious. (Think: Mama bear. With a cub.) I do try to be nice, but nice isn’t always effective. I am not the kind of person who enjoys hurting someone’s feelings. I can see you nodding your head! I’m glad you get it.

Do you need some graceful ways of letting the vampire know it’s time to leave or that it’s a bad time to visit? You might want to check with Miss Manners, but I have a few suggestions.
*I have an appointment at (insert time/place), so I need to have time to get ready.
*I’m sorry, but it’s family time right now.
*Oh, I wish you had called first! I have plans already.
*I’m helping with homework right now. Maybe later?
*Can you come back another day? I’m taking care of chores.
*I have to get up early in the morning, so I need to cut this short.

If none of those work, be more direct. It might feel awkward, but you have to protect your energy and your time. Good luck. If you have any suggestions that work for you, let me know. I love reading comments on my blog. Thanks for reading!

Jersey

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If you know a family who used to have a grey and white Maine Coon cat named Jersey, get them to the computer. I want to tell them something.

When I first saw Jersey’s photo one Saturday on the North Platte Animal Shelter Facebook page, I thought she was stunning. That’s the only word that came to mind. Then I read the short bio on the page and got mad. Her family was moving and turned her in—14 years old (didn’t look it!), spayed and declawed. I tried to imagine how she felt being in a shelter environment. Monday couldn’t come soon enough for me to go and pick her up. I was worried someone else might steal her away before I could get there.

She was still available when I arrived in a rush and breathlessly announced that I had come for Jersey the Maine Coon. Since she was already spayed, she was able to load up for home right away. After seeing how big she was, I congratulated myself on having the good sense to bring the biggest crate I had.

Jersey girl talked all the way home. She has a cute meow that sounds like she’s asking a question. Before she was integrated into my existing family of felines, she slept on my pillow every night. Jersey must have a sense of humor. One night I was awakened by a front paw smacking me between my eyes. She wanted me to pet her.

I have had this beautiful cat for a few months now. I realize I’m not angry at her previous family. Jersey was obviously loved and well fed before. She knows her name and comes quickly for attention. Now that my anger is gone, I understand circumstances change, people move. I also know our pets shouldn’t have to pay for what we do. I love my animals like family and have high expectations of other pet owners.

I want to thank you for loving Jersey. Know that I love her, and she will be with my family until the end of her days. By her behavior, I know she’s comfortable and happy in my home. I hit the lottery the day I adopted her.

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For pictures of more animals needing homes, check out https://www.facebook.com/NorthPlatteAnimalShelter?fref=ts.

Declawing?

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What’s your first reaction when you hear someone say, “I have to get my cat declawed”? Don’t think about it—how does your gut react? My first instinct is to grab that cat and run! Personally, I believe it is an inhumane thing to do, and, as such, I can’t imagine ever having it done to one of my felines.

To better understand the issue, I spoke to my semi-local veterinary clinic about it. Dr. John Werth helped put things in perspective for me. He explained that if a cat is very destructive, the owner may be faced with ugly alternatives—euthanasia, perhaps, or turning the cat in to a shelter (where the cat may be put to sleep if not adopted). Dr. Werth stated for a situation like that, it comes down to the lesser evil—declawing. It makes sense. He also said the vets there talk people out of declawing in many cases. Good for you, Dr. Werth!

We discussed the procedure itself, which disgusts me. According to Dr. Werth, declawing is not simply the removal of the nail and nail bed; it is the removal of the entire first joint of the toe. Ouch, and no thanks.

I asked about claw tips (or covers), and he said that he would be concerned unless the cat owner is very diligent and monitors the appliance carefully. Any device can be misused, either intentionally or unintentionally. In either case, it can harm the animal.

I guess the decision to declaw would have to be decided on a case-by-case basis, but I am still against it unless the animal’s life is at stake.

Sparkle has very sharp claws!

Sparkle has very sharp claws!

That Doggie in the Window

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How could I resist that face?

How could I resist that face?

Remember that old song that asked, “How much is that doggie in the window?” It’s a question asked in pet stores every day. The true cost of that cute puppy isn’t the tag at the pet store register. The mother dog is the one paying the price. Most puppies in pet stores come from puppy mills. When you buy that cute little pup, your money is actually condemning that momma dog to a life in a cage having litter after litter to supply cute pups for you, the consumer, to buy. If that doesn’t touch your heart, do your own research about puppy mills. What you discover may shock you.

I’m writing this post to (hopefully) educate you about the realities of unwanted pets. There are millions of unwanted animals—dogs, cats and even horses. Many of them die because a good home is not found in time. Most county shelters can only house a certain number of pets before shelter workers have to decide who to kill to make room for the next animals who are picked up off the streets or turned in by unthinking owners.

When I lived in Charlotte, North Carolina, I was told by a worker that owner-surrendered animals were put to sleep before the owners had left the premises. I nearly cried. Even the no-kill shelters and rescue groups need help and connections to place animals in good homes.

Did you know that certain kinds of dogs are considered nearly unadoptable? Everyone wants that adorable pup, right? If dogs are large, black or senior, they are hard to place. Pitbulls are the hardest breed to place. According to Julia Musser of Animal Rescue of Kindness (A.R.K.), Pits face problems due to breed-specific legislation restricting Pitbull ownership. It’s basically breed profiling (akin to racial profiling). If you are an older, large-bodied, black Pit, your chances of surviving a shelter are slim to none. Heartbreaking and unfair.

I have adopted nearly all my pets from a shelter or rescue. Others were given to me. I look for the animal that connects with me. In each case, I have gone in with an open mind and heart and “my” pet has found me.

I will not pay hundreds of dollars for a pet when shelter pets are being murdered every day in countries around the world. This is a world-wide issue, not just a national one. Hopefully, you will adopt your next pet from a shelter or rescue. Some rescues ask for an adoption to help cover vet expenses. It’s a fair thing to ask. How else can they help the next hurt, unwanted animal if there’s no money to take it to a vet? Most rescues will ask for references from people who know you. They might even ask to speak with your vet if you have had pets in the past. It’s normal, so don’t get mad about it! A home visit may even be required to seal the deal! The rescue groups want to be sure you can provide the love and care the animal deserves. If the rescue or shelter doesn’t have your dream pet, ask if they can contact you when that special animal (for you) arrives. Rescues network and always want an animal to find a “furever” home. Keep in mind if you check out the dogs or cats at the local animal shelter, you might not see the animal’s true personality until later. The animals are frightened and confused, so be patient and loving. It will pay off! Go in with an open mind and consider adopting one that may be overlooked by the majority of people. I can guarantee that pet will repay your kindness with unconditional love.

If you must find a new home for your pet, PLEASE don’t advertise it on places like Craigslist. The wrong people might come get that animal to use as a bait dog for training aggressive dogs. It’s a death sentence in many cases. I have even read about wives dressing nicely to pick up an animal destined to be killed by her husband’s fighting dog. You think it doesn’t happen? You are wrong. It saddens me to say that.

As many of my friends comment, “There are no problem dogs, just problem owners.” If you need to rehome your pet, contact a rescue group for leads. Nothing makes me madder, however, than hearing someone say, “I have to GET RID OF my dog (cat, horse).” “Getting rid of” implies all kinds of things to me. None of them make me think favorably of you.

If you are ready to adopt, keep reading. Below are some links (from my area) to get you started if you feel ready to make a life-long commitment to a pet.
https://www.facebook.com/juliamariemusser?ref=ts&fref=ts
https://www.facebook.com/NorthPlatteAnimalShelter?fref=ts
https://www.facebook.com/FurtheLoveofPAWSRescue?fref=ts

One of my rescue babies

One of my rescue babies


Chance was adopted through A.R.K. Thank you, Julia Musser!

Chance was adopted through A.R.K. Thank you, Julia Musser!


Poppy came from the North Platte Animal Shelter. Thank you!

Poppy came from the North Platte Animal Shelter. Thank you!

Fired Up in the Land of the Free

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Yes, I am fired up today! I have some things to tell small-town America…things they might not want to read. Let me preface my remarks by stating very clearly: I love living in my small, rural town. It is a great place to raise my daughter, and we feel safe here. I appreciate all the kindness from the people in this Nebraska town. Thank you for accepting us.

This should come as no surprise to people who know me in this town, but I have to say it all anyway. I ask your indulgence. I am a Spanish teacher. I live and breathe the language. I was actually HIRED to speak Spanish and to teach it to your children and grandchildren. The reality is that when I see one of my students around town, I may actually speak to the student (gasp!) IN SPANISH. You should be proud when your student answers in Spanish–or even if the student gives an answer in English that shows he or she understood my comment! The absolute wrong thing to do is tell me to speak English because I’m in America. Why? Keep reading.

My job is to broaden my students’ horizons and to teach them the joy of speaking a second language. It allows the students to experience other cultures and think in different ways. I would also like to point out something you may not realize—the United States does not have an official language. The reality is that America is home to many cultures and languages. Your language is not the ONLY language. Your way, my friend, is not the ONLY way. Your beliefs are not the ONLY beliefs. My job is to help small-town students be ready to move from life in rural America (where people are mostly similar) to a global environment where speaking English and Spanish (or French, Chinese, etc.) could make the difference in dollars later.

If you are uncomfortable with my language skills, ask yourself why. What hidden issues do YOU have that make you feel that way? What prejudices do YOU have in your heart of hearts? Are you afraid you are the topic of discussion if you don’t understand the conversation? (I can assure you, that is usually not the case; it’s human nature to feel that way.)

A short while ago, some community members were upset that my students can recite the Pledge of Allegiance in Spanish. Why? Shouldn’t the focus really be on the honor and commitment of people to the flag no matter what language is used? I received a kind, supportive email from a veteran in our community who believes the language isn’t as important as the respect given to the flag. He is one of our nation’s heroes because he served the United States with honor and pride. Other community members might view me as unpatriotic because we say the Pledge in Spanish, but it’s not the case. My students willingly make cards for deployed servicemen and women, so your argument is not a valid one. My classes even have two adopted Spanish-speaking soldiers. Everything we do is somehow related to my subject matter whether it’s saying the Pledge or making cards to send. The sentiment is more important than the language. Do us all a favor and focus on the big picture. Understand that I care about your children, and I want them to learn as much as possible. I want them prepared for a bright future. Only education across the curriculum can do that. Trust me to DO MY JOB. After all, it’s why I was hired.

I think sometimes people just need something to complain about or they aren’t happy. My advice to those folks: pick a topic and go to it! It won’t keep me from doing my job anyway.

Old Glory

Old Glory